Journal of a Poker Pro

I slept in today until about 4pm. This was not an easy task, as I had to fend off the intruding light from my window, and the annoying rumbles of construction outside. I had to have woken up at least 4 different times. I really didn't feel like rolling out of bed because a) I was hungover, and b) I was having my usual dose of interesting dreams. I can usually just close my eyes and drift right back into REM sleep.

I did have an interesting dream though. Me and some friends were leaving a club and heading back to someone's car. I fell behind the group b/c I was sending a txt msg on my phone, and that severly inhibits my ability to walk. So out of the shadows comes this black guy (its always a black guy, isn't it?) with an angry dog who instructs me to give him my phone. I say no, and he reaches for a gun. I freak out a bit and say "Whoa whoa, relax. If you want it that badly you can have it. Just let me phone my friends and find out where they are so I can at least get home". Being the friendly criminal he was, he obliged. I get on the phone, and then I think I decided to walk off, so he promptly unleashed his dog. The dog attacked my arm, tearing violently into my flesh. This was slightly unpleasant. So I toss my phone at the guy and tell him to call the dog off. He says he doesn't know how. Interesting. So I kick the dog about as hard as I can in the nuts, and then once again in his head after it released my arm. The dog was laying motionless as our criminal starts to cry. He then tells me to give him all my money. I say I have none. I don't. He says we'll go to the ATM. Zing.

So we go to the ATM, but I enter this secret code so that the ATM accesses my fake account which is empty. I show the criminal I have no funds and he lets me go. (This is actually a great security feature all bank cards should have - you enter a special pin number, and your account appears empty).

Ok, so where am I going with this, and how does it relate to poker you're probably thinking. Bear with me, I'm getting to it, I swear.

So I'm playing a session of poker today and while things started off really well, I'm now back to about even for the afternoon. And then it happens - I get dealt 77(on the button) and JJ(in the SB) on two of my tables. I bring both in for a raise. I get 3 callers with 77 and 4 with JJ. Both flops are beautiful. On one table I flop the top set on a very uncoordinated board (I have the best possible hand). With JJ, the flop comes JKK, meaning that only someone with exactly the other 2 kings beats me, which is unlikely given the preflop action... either way, I'm going to try to get all-in on both tables.

With the 77 hand the first person to act moves all in for a bit more than the pot. The other player calls.

With the JJ hand I fire a pot sized bet, praying someone has the K and will raise me. My prayers are answered, and the button moves all-in for about $80. OMG, is it christmas?

So as I'm about to get rich, suddenly my music stops. Oh no. I've been here before. This is not a pretty place. The tables freeze up. I let out a quiet, disbelieving "noo". And it happens. My laptop shuts down. It's overheated for the third time this week (this is a fairly new laptop and should have no problem multitaksing in the manner which I am).

Several more "no"s follow this as I sit there stunned. I then shoot out of my chair and run down 2 flights of stairs to my basement. I figure I have about 1 minute before my hands are folded. The computer is already on, thank god. I turn on pokerstars furiously... It starts to load up when I'm greeted with the wonderful message... "Your version is out of date, click here to update". A few more "no''s escape. I click the update button about a million times. The progress bar inches closer and closer to 100%. Finally its done, faster than expected. I try to log in. I fumble on my password twice before getting it correct. I log in an my KK table pops up with 3 seconds to act. Call. The next table pops up. 1 second to act. Minraiselol! And the caller folds. Phew. Both hands hold up and I make the $133.98 I so desperately deserved.

So I'm wondering now if I'm physic or something. Which would probably be a fairly advantageous skill for a poker player....probably. But I mean, I had a premonition that I would almost get robbed, but then somehow managed to avoid it. And then this happens. TWILIGHT ZONE!! Ok, maybe not. But whatever, it's still makes for a good story.